"quotes"...unquoted.

I have always wanted to post my favorite quotes...So heres my collection:

" The journey ends when lover's meet, every wise man's son doth know"~Shakespear.

"He who learns to obey knows how to command"~anon.

"Success does not consist in never making mistakes but in never making the same one a second time."~George Bernard Shaw

"An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind. "~M.K. Gandhi

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience."~George Bernard Shaw

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."~Albert Einstein

"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."~Sir Winston Churchill

"I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have."~Thomas Jefferson

"The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it."~George Bernard Shaw

"He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'."~Friedrich Nietzsche

"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh."~Voltaire

"I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them."~Ian L. Fleming

"Maybe this world is another planet's Hell."~Aldous Huxley

"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it."~ Oscar Wilde

And i'll end with this...
"A witty saying proves nothing."~Voltaire

signs...

The alarm suddenly goes off with "oh sweet child of mine" booming loudly in the quite room. Oops... i must have pressed the snooze button i think to myself when i check the time: Its 7...
Oh shit, ive overslept, or have i got any sleep, i wonder. No time for lazy stretches today. I tumble out of bed, not realising then that its the wrong side... No breakfast for mee today...shessh... In a hurry to reach my destination on time, i forget to take my cell along... My bike wont start..the @$@#% activa...did we pay 30 grands for this?? And suddenly it springs to life...The roads seemed deserted, with a few exceptions ofcourse...and i wondered and thanked god for it too....heheeh!
I now wonder why i missed soo many signs...
"Oye its sunday ya!!!....wheres the rush...hehehhe!!!"...he yells from top floor.
Embarassed as ever i pretend to look for my cell to check the date...i still dunno y i did that...but the only thing was: i cudnt find it...hehehehh!
Okay...a little dramatic isnt it...but trust mee i had totally forgotten the day of the week...pch pch...some sundays i tell ya...

The perfect match~~

I wonder how they must have found each other...for their diversity knows no bounds.They are the most unique people residing on this planet and they are opposite in every possible way. I must know, u may think, being their first born...but to tell ya the truth, even i am completely baffled as u are.
My mother a softy, a person my friends are at ease with...
My father a coconut, a rough exterior,but a sweet inside...
My mother a gentle disciplinarian..
My father a strict teacher...
My mother a great cook...
My father a great coach...
My mother a believer...
My father a critic...
My mother... My father...
They think differently, both of them. But what astoundes most is...how do they make the couple they are?...perennially complimenting each other, making up for the things the other may lack...
Truly...seeing them makes mee a believer...in destiny, in love, in the match the almighty has created for us to find...
Here's cheers to the Great one for creating the mostest perfect match there ever could have been possible... for i cannot imagine them with anyone else or without each other...and i am not saying this bcoz i am their child...but bcoz i now seem to understand the schemes we are all meant to be a part of...

hehe..one of those nosense-sensible forwards...

WHY A STUDENT FAILS ???
It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year has ONLY 365' days.
Typical academic year for a student.
1. Sundays: 52 Sundays in a year n you know Sundays are for rest.
Days left 313.
2. Summer holidays: 50,where weather is very hot and difficult to study.
Days left 263.
3. 8 hours daily sleep: means 130 days.
Days left 141.
4. 1 hour for daily playing-(good for health): means 15 days.
Days left 126.
5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies-(chew properly & eat): means 30days.
Days left 96.
6. 1 hour for talking [on phone maybe](man is a social animal): means 15 days.
Days left 81.
7. Exam days per year: atleast 35 days.
Days left 46.
8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival holidays: 40 days.
Balance 6 days.
9. Sickness: atleast 3 days.
Remaining days 3.
10. Movies and functions: atleast 2 days.
1 day left.
11. That 1 day is your birthday: "How can you study at that day?"

Balance days 0
Therefore, How can a student PASS....

what if it was real eh??

I recently read this one... it was too hilarious not to mention it in my blog... long live the value of the rupee!
What happens if 1 rupee = 45 dollars !

Scene 1
Venue : Microsoft Corporation, New York , US
Some s/w engineers are seeing some photographs.
s/w engg 1 : What's that?
s/w engg 2 : Bob's photographs from India .
s/w engg 1 : Wow. Let me see. Which is this place?
s/w engg 3 : (Sees the photo) This is Ahmednagar, Maharashtra.
s/w engg 1 : Fundoo yaar! And what is this? He got Bajaj Pulsar also.
s/w engg 2 : Let me see (sees). This guy enjoys life maan...
s/w engg 3 : You know how much an Bajaj Pulsar costs?
Nearly 60K.....Say it in dollars... (60000*45 = 27,00,000 dollars)
s/w engg 2: Oops. We can't dream of such a thing here.
s/w engg 1 : Let's go to India & try for a job.
[Everybody excited.]

SCENE 2
Venue: Sun Microsystems, SanFrancisco , California, US.
s/w engg 1: I'm with you man. My Visa is expected anytime. Soon I will fly to India.
s/w engg 2: Ohhh.... When is the party?
s/w engg 1: When I get it on hand.
s/w engg 2: Where will you be working?
s/w engg 1 : I'll be working in Mangalwarpet
s/w engg 2 : Oh! Mangalwarpet. Great yaar. where it is...
s/w engg 1 : It is in Pune..not poona...too old fashioned...it pronounced poohneigh...get it right k..
s/w engg 3 : Fundoo place yaar. Nice climate Not like California.You'll love the weather yaar. One of my friends is in Aundh...He says it's the ultimate place to live in. Cool maan.
s/w engg 2 : Who is the client yaar?
s/w engg 1: You know Pune Municipal Corporation?
s/w engg 3 : Yeah. PMC. One of my friends is there in the Pot Hole Division. Most challenging job yaar. People are working in the cutting edge of technology there.
s/w engg 1 : I'll be writing software for the accounts department ofthe GCU.
s/w engg 2: GCU? what it means...?
s/w engg 1 : that is Garbage Collecting Unit.
s/w engg 3 : : Great yaar. That's what I like about that country. You can get a job which requires all your skill. Not like here. See I'm writing software for the space shuttle remote control.I hate this.
s/w engg 1 : Don't worry guys. I'll give you my Hotmail id. You can send your resume to me and I'll forward it to the HRD.
[Everybody takes down his Hotmail id.]

SCENE 3
Venue: IBM, New York, US(Conversation between a Male s/w engg. and Female s/w engg.)
Male : Hi!
Female: Hi. You know nah...I'm planning to settle in India soon.
Male : What??
Female : Yeah. My marriage will be here in America only. He is doing his Ph.D in J.N.T.U and he's coming here for a month. His study will be over in 2 months. He's already got a job in MSCB. We planned to settle in Pune itself... I'm also planning to work there. Let's see...
Male: Good luck... dont forget us & US...

SCENE 4
Venue: Intel Corp. US
s/w engg 1: Great news guys. Our George has got admission in the IGNOU with scholarship for B.A History. A great new field yaar...All are excited...
George : Got my Visa yesterday. It's all finalized now.
s/w engg 2 : Congrats yaar. So you are out of this country.
s/w engg 1 : B.A in Histroy...ohh. ..man, enjoy your life there!!
s/w engg 2 :Got full aid, eh?
George : Yeah. Got the UGC scholarship That will be 1200 Rupees / year.
s/w engg 1 : Great. Enjoy.
s/w engg 2 : (Thinking loud): 1200 Indian Rupees...!
that means 1200 * 45 = 54000 Dollars...with that amount I can buy a three bed-room flat & a Mercedes here...!!!

SCENE 5
A foreigner working in Hyderabad as Software Engg gets
a call from his Home ..
Father : What are you doing son ?
S/w Eng : Having breakfast ?
Father : what are you eating ?
S/w Eng: The usual dad...Coconut Sauce and Rice Bread i.e.,(Idli and Chutney)

I hope u donot fail to see the double standards...now ppl....would u like a job in the US?...if 1 rupee=45$...
R.S.V.P.

Its not "fare"...

Thats what my t-shirt read...i wore it in the 8th or 9th maybe....i still have it...it is lime-hidious-green and my cousins loved it coz thats what they described mee as... an" its not fair"kinda person. "Totally wrong", i would defy and crib about it not being fair to label mee....which would futher prove their point.
Today im asking u folks...to simply go ahead answer these questions in ur brain if u can and see how many of the following situations u comply with...

It will pour during mid-summer when u have planned a wonderful evening out...
It will be extra hot esp. when u plan to excercise....
It will burn when it must caramalise....
It will come as a compulsory question only when u leave it for option...
It will close only when u suppose it must be open...
It will ask your best friend only when u have intentions...
It will appear only when ur totally bankupt and done with shopping...
It will dissapear from the shelves [and market for that matter] when ur looking for it....
It will be in sale only when u dont want it....
It will be too small or too large....
It will not work when u want it too....
and u can go on and on if u must...

but i rather not.....
For i know i have had my lucky moments which as human nature, many people who agree with most of wat ive written, tend to forget....Because im not the "its not fair" kinda person....im the person who faces the sunshine and lets her shadow fall behind, i perceive the glass half full and not half empty....thus i win the old arguement....now tell mee people isnt this just fair!!!